Thank you for writing to your mum and me about this. We are grateful that you have demonstrated your trust in us by writing to us this way. I don't blame you in the least for being distressed, although I sincerely hope I can put your mind more at ease about what happened.
We did have a pretty good idea of what happened from a private message to your mum from your friend Sally-Anne Perks. I am very sorry that you had to go through this and that you are struggling due to these malicious attempts to cause you pain.
Please understand that your mum and I do not hold this against you. Whoever hexed you undoubtedly wanted to cause you great embarrassment, perhaps even straining your family ties because they tried to force you to feel shame for your family. But they only succeed, son, if you buy into what they forced you to say, if you agree with them.
To be blunt, I don't mean to deny that perhaps our family is rather worse off, economically, than those of many of your classmates (although you would probably be surprised to learn how many of your friends' parents actually do have difficulty making ends meet). I do deny that that is a cause for shame. Relative poverty can be certainly wearying, inconvenient and exceedingly stressful. No one likes feeling pinched in the pocket. It does NOT mean, however, that you cannot hold your head up just as high as anyone else you know. You matter as much as any Draco Malfoy or Padma Patil at Hogwarts, and don't let anyone convince you otherwise. Pots of galleons will not add years to your life, make up the deficits of a cruel or malicious character, or win you friends--or at least not the sort of friends really worth having, the ones who will stick with you through thick or thin, through every up and down of the currency exchange rate at Gringotts.
That being said, I do not blame you one iota for being upset. The hex under which you suffered is related to one of the three spells which were once called 'Unforgiveables,' the one called 'Imperio.' This is the spell which the caster uses to force the victim to do whatever he or she likes. And I mean whatever it may be, whether it is to injure themselves or hurt another person, even to the point of death. For generations, this spell was regarded by all right-thinking witches and wizards with horror. There is indeed something deeply distressing to be forced to do something against one's own inclination and character.
But one thing has always been understood about Imperio, as well as the less far reaching hexes of the same class to which Imperio is related (including this one): the person who had the spell cast upon them is never at fault or responsible for what he or she does while under the spell. It was even a valid legal defence in our courts (although, admittedly, now that Imperio is more widespread, even advocated by some within our own government, this legal defence has often proved less successful than it was in the past).
Your mum and I hold to the old school of thought, son. Any spell that compels you to do something contrary to your nature, that you certainly do not wish to do, is wrong. And you are not responsible, so there is no need for you to apologise to us. The ones who hexed you should be apologising to you. Do not reward those who did this to you by buying into what they are trying to force you to believe. You are a fine upstanding young man, whatever your family's bank balance. You have a family who loves you, true friends, and a bright future ahead of you. We are proud of you, just as we are proud of all of our children. Hold on to that, son, if you ever find yourself doubting.
I hope that this eases your mind somewhat. Thank you again for writing to us.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
branchandroot
no subject
Date: 2010-09-17 05:32 pm (UTC)Thank you for writing to your mum and me about this. We are grateful that you have demonstrated your trust in us by writing to us this way. I don't blame you in the least for being distressed, although I sincerely hope I can put your mind more at ease about what happened.
We did have a pretty good idea of what happened from a private message to your mum from your friend Sally-Anne Perks. I am very sorry that you had to go through this and that you are struggling due to these malicious attempts to cause you pain.
Please understand that your mum and I do not hold this against you. Whoever hexed you undoubtedly wanted to cause you great embarrassment, perhaps even straining your family ties because they tried to force you to feel shame for your family. But they only succeed, son, if you buy into what they forced you to say, if you agree with them.
To be blunt, I don't mean to deny that perhaps our family is rather worse off, economically, than those of many of your classmates (although you would probably be surprised to learn how many of your friends' parents actually do have difficulty making ends meet). I do deny that that is a cause for shame. Relative poverty can be certainly wearying, inconvenient and exceedingly stressful. No one likes feeling pinched in the pocket. It does NOT mean, however, that you cannot hold your head up just as high as anyone else you know. You matter as much as any Draco Malfoy or Padma Patil at Hogwarts, and don't let anyone convince you otherwise. Pots of galleons will not add years to your life, make up the deficits of a cruel or malicious character, or win you friends--or at least not the sort of friends really worth having, the ones who will stick with you through thick or thin, through every up and down of the currency exchange rate at Gringotts.
That being said, I do not blame you one iota for being upset. The hex under which you suffered is related to one of the three spells which were once called 'Unforgiveables,' the one called 'Imperio.' This is the spell which the caster uses to force the victim to do whatever he or she likes. And I mean whatever it may be, whether it is to injure themselves or hurt another person, even to the point of death. For generations, this spell was regarded by all right-thinking witches and wizards with horror. There is indeed something deeply distressing to be forced to do something against one's own inclination and character.
But one thing has always been understood about Imperio, as well as the less far reaching hexes of the same class to which Imperio is related (including this one): the person who had the spell cast upon them is never at fault or responsible for what he or she does while under the spell. It was even a valid legal defence in our courts (although, admittedly, now that Imperio is more widespread, even advocated by some within our own government, this legal defence has often proved less successful than it was in the past).
Your mum and I hold to the old school of thought, son. Any spell that compels you to do something contrary to your nature, that you certainly do not wish to do, is wrong. And you are not responsible, so there is no need for you to apologise to us. The ones who hexed you should be apologising to you. Do not reward those who did this to you by buying into what they are trying to force you to believe. You are a fine upstanding young man, whatever your family's bank balance. You have a family who loves you, true friends, and a bright future ahead of you. We are proud of you, just as we are proud of all of our children. Hold on to that, son, if you ever find yourself doubting.
I hope that this eases your mind somewhat. Thank you again for writing to us.
Love,
Dad