Order Only Private Message to Alice Longbottom and Albus Dumbledore

[alt_ron]

Um.

I need some advice.

Last Sunday I had to go to meet two Aurors who came up to Hogwarts for a YPL presentation. I got a letter at supper Saturday telling me to meet them on Sunday. So I did, and it was about my being nominated for an internship with them during hols. I was nominated by Desai, who was head of CCF last summer along with Dolohov. Professor Dolohov also gave me a strong evaluation, I think, and they had statements from the enforcers who came out to Stretton's farm last summer the night Sally Anne and I caught those thieves trying to steal plants out of the fields.

Anywiz. I was as surprised as you'd guess, so I don't know how I did in the interview. They weren't really impressed with my marks, but they said my OWLs were alright. I really don't know anything else about it yet besides that they said certain students with strong aptitude (that's what they said, really) sometimes get invited to intern with the Aurors over Christmas hols. Sandoval said that's how she got her first introduction to the department. She was one of the people who interviewed me, I mean, and she said this is a way to get a foot in the door that could boost chances of getting accepted to the training programme. They said the next training class is likely to be formed two summers from now, which is why they're looking at current NEWT students.

So. Maybe nothing'll come out of this. Because I'm not ranked highly enough, probably, and I only got the one O in Defence. But I did take the interview seriously, and I tried to make them think I was honoured, and, um, I did try to make it sound like I'd always wanted to grow up and become an Auror, reading all the comics, and the Auror Brightwand books, which I did read some of--once I got to school, mostly, but I made it sound as if I'd really liked them.

Do you think I should do it if they invite me to apply for this internship? Professor Dumbledore, I know I'd have to be solid with Occlumency for it to be worth risking.

I'm not sure when I'll hear, but maybe tomorrow since today's the first of the month and tomorrow's Monday. I thought about waiting and only saying anything about it if I actually hear back from them, but then I guess I don't know how much time they'll give me to decide.

Comments

[alt_albus]

Indeed.

The Occlumency is a challenge, yes.

The invitation is an opportunity, yes, but also a great risk. Not, I would think, the internship so much as what might be offered after.

Alice, do you have thoughts?

[alt_alice]

That sort of position would be useful, no doubt, but you would be asked to do things regularly that you might find most difficult.

Is this something you genuinely wish to pursue? Duty can help one push through rough spots, but if you would be utterly miserable at this job, that would make a difficult situation worse.

This is an initial step down that particular path, of course, not a final one, and there would certainly be opportunities to better assess your suitability and desire to continue as you learn more about the requirements. I think if you're interested enough in this potential opportunity to learn more, an internship would be a reasonable way to do that.

I'd ask that as you consider this possibility, you do some soul-searching about what your potential weaknesses could be, and where you would draw the line in terms of what you might have to be prepared to do. There's no way to know everything right away, of course, but you can certainly give serious thought to whether this would be something you could honestly see yourself doing on a daily basis, and what sort of obstacles you might encounter along the way.

You don't have to come up with a proper answer right away -- these things take time, and, as I've said, this internship might be a way to help you be able to more accurately weigh your options. I don't want you to feel as if you have no choice in the matter, or that you're automatically obligated to take advantage of this opportunity.

I'm not sure what they'd have you do during this internship -- Bill might be able to find out more -- but I agree with Albus that your work on Occlumency would have to be stepped up in preparation for it, as you'd be walking into the dragon's nest as it were.

I'd talk to Bill a bit about the pressures he's under at work, to start thinking about what it would be like for you -- there'd be some things that would be drastically different, of course, but he regularly has to do things he finds distasteful or difficult, and you might find that gives a bit of context to what challenges you might face.

Lastly, I apologise for the personal nature of this question, but have you ever had a powerful reaction to Dark Magic? Do you find it to be incredibly unpleasant or enjoyable?

[alt_alice]

And may I say that regardless of what you decide, the fact that you were selected to be interviewed for this opportunity is quite an accomplishment. It comes along with some very difficult choices to be sure, but you have every right to be proud.

Private Message to Albus

[alt_alice]

You work more closely with him than I do. I know you prefer to keep your own council on most things, but I'd appreciate your perspective.

How capable is he when it comes to his Occlumency? Would it ever improve to the point at which he'd need it to be? Do you think he'd have the right sort of temperament for this?

Re: Private Message to Albus

[alt_albus]

Slow progress on the Occlumency, I fear, though there is some. He might learn enough in two years time. Certainly, not enough before the holidays to protect himself sufficiently from a skilled Legilimens.

I rather think the question is whether anyone would try during the internship.

As to temperament, ah - his maturity comes and goes, as one would expect at his age, but I believe that if he committed to this course, improved his skills in specific areas, and gave careful thought to what he would be asked to do, he could be successful. Whether that would be the best choice, however, is entirely another question.

Re: Private Message to Albus

[alt_alice]

Bill can see what the internship might entail, to see how risky it would be.

My first impulse is to say that it isn't the best choice, by far -- I've seen the toll the Ministry has taken on Arthur and Bill, and his challenges would be far greater. I know he isn't his older brother, but it's a thankless, difficult task and I'm not sure any of us would have the fortitude to make it through such a trial unscathed and unchanged.

I think we might talk more to him as we go, the both of us. I'm hoping we might all be able to either seriously determine whether he is suited and weigh our choices, or help him change his own mind to an option that would be less fraught but still of great use.

Private Message to Professor Dumbledore

[alt_ron]

I keep wondering what Dad would say. And what he'd ask me. You know how some of those memories keep coming out when we practise? I just really wish I could talk to him. Could we- I mean, if I could just remember more, it would almost be like talking to him. Because he always knew how to talk stuff through.

And... Mrs Longbottom says I should be talking to Bill, but that's just not-- He's not like Dad at all, but he wants me to pretend he is, and I can't. I mean, it just muddles everything, and then I won't want to do this because he's got himself involved in it. Even if, really, I should do it. D'you see?

Cause, well. I admit one of the things that makes me want to do it is that it would be dead useful Ministry work that wouldn't ever be in Bill's department. I mean, dead useful to the Order. I want to do something that will make a difference, and if this is something I have a chance to do that no one else does, then I should do it, I think.


Oh. And. Do you think I could learn the Animagus transformation? Sally Anne thinks     It would be a different way of solving the Occlumency problem, wouldn't it? Because I'm actually, y'know, good at Transfig. Anywiz, it's just something I've been thinking about.

[alt_ron]

Thanks.

And yeah, I know this is a serious thing and that it's dangerous. But if I'm the only one we've got who's going to get a chance like this, then I think I should go on wih it.

If I do get the chance, y'know?

Re: Private Message to Professor Dumbledore

[alt_albus]

I believe we might have some options for your memory, Mr Weasley. If you are free after classes tomorrow, or tomorrow evening, we might talk more then.

As to your brother, well, brothers can be difficult, yes. If talking with your eldest brother is too diffcult, have you considered talking to one of your other brothers in the Order? They might have some insight for you without the same pressure of expectation.

The Animagus transformation is not one I had actively considered. You understand it is a great deal of work, I am certain. Perhaps you might find time to talk to our established Animagi, and see what advice they have for you. It would indeed solve the Occlumency problem, and have other uses beside.

[alt_alice]

Just because one can doesn't always mean one should. This is one of many possibilities for you that we might consider, and it’s an important enough possibility that I think it's worth serious thought.