I Solemnly Swear That I Am Up To No Good Private Message to Sally Anne Perks and Pansy Parkinson

[alt_ron]

So, er. Towler's quit playing chess with me until I write this letter thing to Director Selwyn 'cause he says I really pretty much have to do whatever it takes to stay in YPL. Says he'd totally be doing it if they'd started with his year, and says it's going to be really, really a bad thing for people who drop out, y'know. Basically all the stuff we've talked about, but I mean, he's older and he thinks the same thing. That it'll help us get jobs or hurt us a lot--one way or the other.

So, yeah.

And anyway, I was only sort of kidding when I asked if you'd write it for me, but, uh, they sort of sat there and watched me while I wrote a draft of it, so I've got this bit written, and it's probably completely naff. So could you take a look and tell me what to say instead?


Uh, so

Dear Director Selwyn.

My name is Ronald Weasley, and you might not remember, but we've talked before. Here in the journals. One time. And I was Mad Eye's Mad Cat in the play this spring, and maybe you remember that since you said Ar your daughter liked the way I played it. Anywiz, I'm writing because I'm in the YPL. You know, the Young Protectors' League. And we're supposed to write a letter to someone who works in a field we're interested in. So I've been thinking a lot about what I might want to do, and I decided probably not working with dragons like my older brother Charlie does because they don't take very many people into that programme and it'd be sort of awful to have to train under my own brother. If you know what I mean. I've met some of the dragon handlers, and they're a pretty rough lot and I think they'd pretty much spend all they'retheir time taking the mickey if I got into training. So not that. And so then I've been thinking about jobs at the Ministry, which you probably know is where my dad and my other brother work. My dad's in the Department of Purity Control and works with the Muggle Domestication department, too, and my brother Bill's in Communications. And I guess those are both good jobs that, you know, make a contribution to the Protectorate and stuff. And Bill got a promotion last year, so I guess he's really good at what he's doing. But I'm not sure I want to always be working in an office indoors, so I've been talking to people about what I like to do and what sort of jobs that might mean I'd be good at, and one of the people in my House said I ought to think about surveying because I like exploring and flying and finding places out in the country that've been left empty and all. And she'd heard that there's a Department of Regional Restoration and Rural Reclamation that's surveying all the places around where Muggles used to live that could be good places for wizards to start new towns of our own since there are getting to be more of us. And I think that'd be a completely wizard job to have! Especially the part where she said she'd heard they're planning to blow up some of the rotten old Muggle places to allow nature to take them back faster so they'll be beautiful again. That'd be amazing to get to blow stuff up. Um, and also to help plan where to build new things or fix and improve places that are okay but just need the Muggle stuff taken away. And, anywiz, I'm writing to you because that's part of your big department, right? And you were nice when we talked before, so I thought you'd probably not be annoyed if I wrote you about this. And I was hoping maybe you'd even write me back to tell me if this'd be a good sort of job for me to try to have someday.

So, yeah. Thank you, sir. I really appreciate your time and everything.

Sincerely,
Ronald Weasley
Gryffindor House
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

So. What'd you think?

Comments

[alt_sally_anne]

Um, I may have a few suggestions before the end of the day. Don't post it like that. There's plenty of time, but Towler's right, earlier is better than later, so it's good you wrote something.

But don't post it yet.

[alt_ron]

Um, okay.

I guess it's pretty rubbish, then? What I wrote.

I just don't know how to say stuff right. For a letter like this, anywiz.

[alt_sally_anne]

I don't think Pansy's feeling up to doing this today, just so you know. So if you want her thoughts too you should wait a few more days.

My name is Ronald Weasley, and you might not remember, but we've talked before. Here in the journals. One time. And I was Mad Eye's Mad Cat in the play this spring, and maybe you remember that since you said Ar your daughter liked the way I played it. Anywiz, I'm writing because I'm in the YPL. You know, the Young Protector's League. And we're supposed to write a letter to someone who works in a field we're interested in.

Just introduce yourself and don't remind him you talked to him that time, you were HEXED and just because he thought it was funny doesn't mean it's the sort of thing you should be reminding him of.

You can mention the play, though. Oh, and you don't have to tell him what the YPL is, I'm sure he knows. So something like this:

My name is Ronald Weasley. You might remember that I played Mad Eye's Mad Cat in the spring play. As a project for the Young Protector's League, we are each writing to someone in a field we are interested in for a career.

And then put in a blank line. Like I just did. When you write it all in one big block it's hard to read and you sound like one of those drunk adults who just can't shut it.

So I've been thinking a lot about what I might want to do, and I decided probably not working with dragons like my older brother Charlie does because they don't take very many people into that programme and it'd be sort of awful to have to train under my own brother. If you know what I mean. I've met some of the dragon handlers, and they're a pretty rough lot and I think they'd pretty much spend all their time taking the mickey if I got into training. So not that.

Just take all that out.

And so then I've been thinking about jobs at the Ministry, which you probably know is where my dad and my other brother work. My dad's in the Department of Purity Control and works with the Muggle Domestication department, too, and my brother Bill's in Communications. And I guess those are both good jobs that, you know, make a contribution to the Protectorate and stuff. And Bill got a promotion last year, so I guess he's really good at what he's doing.

This isn't too bad but don't say 'I guess they're good jobs' because you're trying to sound like you WANT this! Maybe something like this (after another blank line):

As you know, both my father and my brother Bill work at the Ministry in your department. My dad's in the Department of Purity Control and works with the Muggle Domestication department, too, and my brother Bill's in Communications. I would also like to work at the Ministry someday, probably in one of the departments that you oversee.

And then put in a new space and leave out the parts about being indoors all the time.

But I'm not sure I want to always be working in an office indoors, so I've been talking to people about what I like to do and what sort of jobs that might mean I'd be good at, and one of the people in my House said I ought to think about surveying because I like exploring and flying and finding places out in the country that've been left empty and all. And she'd heard that there's a Department of Regional Restoration and Rural Reclamation that's surveying all the places around where Muggles used to live that could be good places for wizards to start new towns of our own since there are getting to be more of us. And I think that'd be a completely wizard job to have! Especially the part where she said she'd heard they're planning to blow up some of the rotten old Muggle places to allow nature to take them back faster so they'll be beautiful again. That'd be amazing to get to blow stuff up. Um, and also to help plan where to build new things or fix and improve places that are okay but just need the Muggle stuff taken away.

So, you want to sound here like you've actually RESEARCHED this, IS there a Department of Regional Restoration and Rural Reclaiming? You can check on this with Professor Sinistra, you know. You want to have the name exactly right, and you should already know before you write what they do so that you sound like you care enough to look it up! (I know you don't, and that doesn't much matter, you should just try to SOUND like you care.)

Anyway, don't forget your blank line and then say something like this:

I understand that your department oversees the Department of Regional Restoration and Rural Reclamation, which surveys former Muggle habitations to see whether they should be restored to a fully natural state, or developed into new wizarding towns. This job sounds really exciting to me! I think I would be good at this because I like exploring and flying, and finding places in the country that have been left empty. I particularly like the idea of blowing up rotten old Muggle places so that nature will take them back faster, and make them beautiful again. I also like the idea of planning where to build new things.

See, I kept most of your lines there because what you said wasn't bad, just in the wrong order.

And, anywiz, I'm writing to you because that's part of your big department, right? And you were nice when we talked before, so I thought you'd probably not be annoyed if I wrote you about this. And I was hoping maybe you'd even write me back to tell me if this'd be a good sort of job for me to try to have someday.

Remember Professor Sinistra said we can't expect a letter back? I actually did get a letter back (Madam Pomfrey wants me to come to tea to talk to her, which -- well, I hope she doesn't make me sit near the stuff with the hospital smells, or I won't enjoy the tea much. But you're right she's kind and maybe if I'm in the hospital wing when I'm NOT sick or hurt it won't be quite so bad) but I said I didn't expect a letter back as she's very busy, and you should say something like that. Also, you don't say 'anywiz' in a formal letter because it's slang. So, put in a blank line again and something like this:

I'm writing to you instead of the surveyors because what matters the most to me is serving Our Lord by working for the Ministry, and I would most like to work in Protectorate Affairs, your division. I like the idea of serving Our Lord as directly as possible, and it's hard to find a better place for that than your department! I admire you a lot, and I know you're a good person to work for. I don't expect a response because I know you're very busy, but thank you for everything you do for us.

And then say:

Thank you for your time, sir. Sincerely, Ronald Weasley.

I'm glad Towler made you write, because this sounds a lot more like you than it would have if I'd just written it. It will sound like you had a friend read it and give you suggestions but THAT'S fine.

[alt_ron]

Awesomely awesome. You're the best, Perks!

[alt_ron]

I decided not to wait for Pansy, but, um, is she okay? It's about that Mr Black, isn't it?

[alt_sally_anne]

Yes.

It was a year ago he disappeared.